Tell me if this sounds familiar:
Oh! You better watch out
You better not cry
You better not pout
I'm telling you why
Many if not all of you may know that this is the chorus to a very famous Christmas jingle. For years I had never really thought about the lyrics. But now that I am married to Katherine, I have to say I am appalled. Katherine is the world's most accomplished pouter. If you have not had the pleasure of seeing this, make sure you ask her to pout for you. It's perfect! And now it appears that Santa has a long standing vendetta against Katherine, and I for one will not stand for it.
So I'm starting a campaign to repel this onslaught of anti-pouting. I don't know exactly how I am going to do this, but I'm certain it requires me to stay up on December 24 to have a little chat with Mr. Kringle. Don't worry, I'm not going to get violent, but I do anticipate the exchange to be heated. If this causes any of you to not receive your gifts on the 25th, I apologize. But I cannot allow Santa to continue with this reckless and ill informed rhetoric. Katherine deserves better ;)
(You see, this is what this blog is reduced to when Katherine is too busy to post.)
*Legal disclaimer: All threats made or percieved to be made against Kris Kringle, or any of his many aliases, are satirical in nature, blah, blah, blah (and yes, that is a valid legal term, at least in the Unified North Pole Court System).